Pillar 02
For Parents at Every Level
The research is clear: the single greatest predictor of a young athlete's enjoyment, performance, and longevity in sport is not their coach, their talent, or their training program. It is the behavior of their parents. This pillar gives parents an honest, practical guide to being the asset their athlete needs — not the pressure they are trying to escape.
Dr. John Tauer, a sports psychologist who has worked with athletes at every level, asked hundreds of college athletes a simple question: 'What is the best thing your parents said to you after a game?'
The overwhelming answer was this: 'I love watching you play.'
Nothing about the score. Nothing about the mistakes. Nothing about what to work on. Just unconditional enjoyment of watching their child compete.
The worst thing parents said? 'You should have...' and 'Why didn't you...'
The car ride home is one of the most psychologically significant moments in a young athlete's development. What you say — and what you do not say — in those 20 minutes shapes how your child feels about sport, about themselves, and about you.
The two sentences: 'I love watching you play.' And then: 'Are you hungry?'
That is it. Everything else can wait.
This honest 8-question assessment will help you identify your current role in your athlete's journey — and where small adjustments could make a significant difference.
1.After a game or practice, what do you typically talk about first?
2.When your athlete's coach makes a decision you disagree with, what do you do?
3.How often do you watch game film, stats, or recruiting content on your athlete's behalf?
4.When your athlete wants to quit or take a break from their sport, your first response is:
5.How would your athlete describe the car ride home after a tough loss?
6.Do you coach your athlete from the stands during games?
7.How do you handle it when your athlete is not getting the playing time you think they deserve?
8.How often does your athlete's athletic performance affect your mood at home?